Saturday, August 29, 2009

That's One Biiiiiiiig Casket

Today is the big day... Ted Kennedy laid to rest. Not that the event will keep his name off of every talking head news show for the next month, but we will no longer have to watch him get ever fatter. All right, enough with the insults; this is his day. I wanted to offer a salute to the man who lost to Jimmy Carter, but my Boston correspondent was arrested last night on terrorism charges for wearing a Cartoon Network T-Shirt in public. So, I fall back to a submission Maryann McCrory, a dear friend and the only MENSAN that reads this blog, sent to me the other day. This is from The Globe, Volume 38 - Number 18; April 30, 1991

‛A naked and drunk Ted is an awesome, awful sight!’
The allegations leveled against rape suspect William Kennedy Smith are "just the tip of the iceberg" involving the Kennedy family, a jet-set columnist says. And Teddy is one of the raunchiest clan members of all!

Taki, a high society columnist and Greek millionaire, recalls an incident when Teddy arrived for a visit to Greece - and ended up stripping naked and grabbing at an innocent girl.

"He arrived with his nephew, Joe, and asked my girlfriend to bring a couple of her friends along for an after-dinner drink," says Taki. "Had I known then what I know now, I would have brought wrestling champion Hunk Hogan instead!

"After introductions, I took my girl and Joe and left for a nightclub. Teddy asked the third girl, Anita Clifford, to stay a minute.

"The next thing I knew, she came to my house in a state of hysteria. It seems Teddy suddenly got undressed and ... grabbed for her.

"When she screamed, he stopped. But she was already frightened out of her wits. A naked, drunk Teddy can be an awesome as well as an awful sight.

"The next morning, the Kennedys flew out to go see the Pope -- of all people! Meanwhile, poor Anita remained half-hysterical with fright.

"Her father flew over," Taki recalls. "But it was taken no further, as the Cliffords are not the type of people who seek publicity."

Although William Kennedy Smith is portrayed by the Kennedys as a quiet, dignified young man, Taki claims that he's really a savage brute who once beat up a defenseless young girl.

"Willie Smith beat up an English girl I know well," he says. "I asked her to testify against him. She told me she was too scared. As a result she returned to England and has never come back."


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