This 'n That

I've been off the computer the last couple of days because of a terrible infection. Some dunderhead decided to write a program that would worm itself onto my computer at work to pop up warnings that some program was trying to worm itself onto my computer. A horrible mess that is still ongoing. At home, my wife's computer got the same. I have hidden all weekend in the corner of my closet, clutching all my electromedia protectively.

Here's the deal: anyone who writes a virus should be executed. It is a horribly insidious thing to do, not to mention supremely cowardly. I consider it the digital equivalent of torturing neighborhood cats, a great identifier of the sociopath in the making. I say kill the hackers before they start trying to have drifters for dinner.

Over the weekend Barack Obama made new strides in alienating himself from the American public. His proponents bragged that he was finally going to conduct one of those Town Hall Meetings he promised during the campaign. His detractors couldn't resist pointing out that it was being held in China.

But before reaching out to his comrades in the People's Republic of China, he participated in another event of his Worldwide Limbo Contest, this time defeating 5'5" Emporer Akihito of Japan. It should be remembered that the undefeated Obama stooped before the Saudi Crown Prince just last April, showing the world he could bow lower than the 5'6" Abdul-Aziz.

His greatest challenge will be his upcoming bout against North Korea's Kim Jong-il, measuring just 27" at the shoulders.

The wait is nearly over; The Twilight Saga: New Moon opens in theaters everywhere this Friday. Do you remember when you could identify a vampire by his hideous fangs...

... rather than his pouty eyeliner?