Arnold? Arnold who?

Back when Arnold Schwarzenegger was still in short pants and playing in the sandbox, there was Jack LaLanne. Mr. LaLanne passed away yesterday at the age of 96.

He was probably best known by our youngest readers as the Juicer salesman, but for millions of us older Americans Jack LaLanne was the fitness god. Among his many physical accomplishments was a 1000 push-up demonstration on “You Asked For It” in 23 minutes... at the age of 43! I once kept count of the number of push-ups I was forced to do back in my Corps of Cadets days. There was one morning when I was stuck in the dorm as the only freshman and racked up around 850... over the course of the entire morning. I can't imagine doing 1000 at one sitting. Heck, at 39 years of age I can't imagine doing 50 push-ups... for the rest of my life.

LaLanne said he was a sugar addict as a young man but then heard a talk about vegetarianism, whole grains, rice, and such witchcraft that turned his life around. He began exercising and eating right. As a testament to the soundness of his healthy lifestyle, in 1990 he claimed:

I never think of my age, never. I could be 20 or 100. I never think about it, I'm just me. Look at Bob Hope, George Burns. They're more productive than they've ever been in their whole lives right now.

Eternal youth, that's what Jack LaLanne represented to so many of us. And now he's gone. And that means that I will die, too.

Wait a mintue. Jack LaLanne was fit as a fiddle. George Burns drank and smoked cigars. Jack LaLanne was 96. George Burns was 100 when he died...

See you in 2071, folks!