Thursday, August 19, 2010

Pardon My Blasphemer

WWJWD?

I guess I was hooked with Raising Arizona. Anyone who casts Tex Cobb in a feature film wears a soft spot onto my heart, but aside from that, it was just a great movie. The Coen Brothers established themselves as a force to watch. (For my fellow Bruce Campbell fans out there, Joel Coen helped edit The Evil Dead.) Time and time again the Coen's have proven their success is no fluke: The Hudsucker Proxy; Fargo; O Brother, Where Art Thou?; No Country for Old Men; and of course, The Big Lebowski. I've left out a few I haven't seen, several I hadn't heard of, and their recent disappointing foray into green politics. But by and large, these guys make great films.

Their latest project running is a remake of 1969's True Grit. Some of you may have heard of this movie before. It featured Robert Duvall, Dennis Hopper, Glenn Campbell, and some big cowboy guy. (I wouldn't have thought there was anyone on the planet that hadn't seen True Grit, but leave it to Matt Damon to surprise us all with a gem like this: "I've never even seen the original John Wayne movie... our movie is totally different." Wow! Turns out his spin as genius Will Hunting was a helluvan acting job.) True to form the Coen's will be reaching into their designer Clint Eastwood School of Casting Bag to re-cast some friends, among them Jeff Bridges as Marshal Reuben J. Cogburn.

I never thought I'd live to see a Duke movie be remade. He's just too much of an icon. John Wayne always played John Wayne. There is no other interpretation. Period. I mean, we all love our Elvis Impersonators (recently discovered I have one in the family), but there are no John Wayne-a-likes. This just doesn't make sense. Now... having said that...

If anyone could pull this off... Parents, please take your children out of the room... Sensitive folks please stop reading now... I am warning you that the blasphemer is forthcoming... Tim, I'm sorry, man... if anyone could pull off filling the Duke's boots in this particular role, The Dude can.

I know, I know. Lightning crashing, flames building, gnashing of teeth. But you have to admit that Jeff Bridges has become pretty darned good at playing a fat, slovenly, crude drunk. He pulled off portraying Waylon Kristofferhaggard very well. Dude Lebowski - say no more. There was Wild Bill, The Fisher King, and... come to think of it: this guy gravitates toward drunks like Susan Sarandon to sluts.

Anyway, to you fellow Duke fans, at least now we'll be able to pooh-pooh someone else for playing that part, instead of shaking our heads every time Rooster Cogburn comes on TV.

SHE'S BA-AAAAAACK!

Speaking of rolls, it has been announced that Rosie O'Donnell will be returning to television on The Oprah Network. I don't know when or how because I didn't read any of the story behind the headline. I just wanted to point out that we are so completely over-saturated with "entertainment" outlets today. I used to be able to say there are television series I had never watched. Then there were television channels I had never tuned into. Now, there is going to be an entire Network that will completely escape my attention.

Oh wait, I forgot about the WB.

HE'S BA-RAAAAACK!

Grab your seat, this is gonna shock you! It seems that more people today believe Barack Obama is a Muslim than when he took office. It's true - you can read it here. (Almost as surprising is an AP writer referring to the Pew Research Center as "nonpartisan.") According to this article the percentage of respondents "who correctly say he is a Christian is down to just 34 percent." Pitiful.

Get this through your heads people! President Barack Obama is a Christian. Accept it. Get real. Look, it doesn't matter that he doesn't attend a Christian church... well... ever. Do you go to church every Sunday? It doesn't matter how many Muslim leaders around the world he bows to. He's just being respectful and open to our international 'friends.' Do you really think he wants a mosque built at Ground Zero? No! He said he just feels Muslims have the right to celebrate their victory just like anyone else. Like the way we celebrate VJ Day or the 4th of July or Christmas.

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs put the issue to rest today:
I have spoken with the President on this issue. He wanted me to assure the American people that he is 100% Christian... and that if anyone claims otherwise he will declare Jihad on them and cut their heads off!


There you have it.

5 comments:

  1. Just read it....am mulling it over...have my decision....you are wrong! NO ONE and I repeat NO ONE can EVER be The Duke!!!

    Now, the Dude might do a decent job at being a rough drunk and it might be a decent movie to watch when nothing else is on, but that is it. End of story! - Benita.

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  2. I was skeptical at first but I do think he will pull it off. He might also be up for another Oscar. Politics aside the Coen brothers are probalby my favorite filmakers next to the guys at Pixar. - bigjimsmith

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  3. As always, well written Ed. Great work.

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  4. Not so fast! I can see your point, but you are absolutely wrong. Bridges has played some outstanding roles, but 30 years after he has died, and a re-make is filmed for 1 of his movies, the question asked won't be "who is playing Jeff Bridges?" This is the response I received when I told associates/friends there was a True Grit re-make in the works. The question was "who is playing the Duke or John Wayne?", not who is playing Rooster. I almost watched the re-make of "StageCoach" once, by accident. I saw it listed on the TV guide, then the film started rolling, in color. I thought it was some kind of conspiracy, such as Ted Turned converting another movie to color....when I saw the cast list rolling, and no Duke, I began reaching for my remote....saw Ann-Margret's name.. and decided to watch a moment, then when the opening scene began, I could not handle the, the, .....I don't even know what to call the emotion I felt. Suffice it to say, I threw the original Stagecoach in the VCR and began watching. Moral of the Story, don't remake a Duke movie, John Ford movie, or even a Henry Hathaway movie. None the less, I will give credit...good post Edward, almost convincing.

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  5. Folks, I want you to know that I have written on everything from Farm Town to taxes to health care reform to the war on Islam... but it took a piece about John Wayne to get my buddy Tim to comment.

    Tim, I'm in complete agreement on the issue. I will watch the movie (typically, long after everyone else has seen on regular TV), but I just can't wrap my mind around a re-Wayne being any good.

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